You are not alone.

Attachment Based Emotionally Focused Therapy to help you Shine!

 

My approach is trauma informed and integrates emotionally focused therapy based in attachment theory, mindful self compassion, cognitive behavioral therapy and polyvagal theory.

 

How I work and why:

What happens when you think about dealing with a difficult problem or troubling emotions? It might seem overwhelming, impossible, scary. Here’s a story that might help you get a sense of how working with me might help this process not seem so daunting. Researchers did a study of how people perceived the steepness of a hill or mountain. When they were looking at the hill alone, they perceived it to be much more steep and difficult. However, when they were looking at this hill with a close, trusted, supportive friend next to them, they perceived it to be less steep and difficult. When we feel the support of a responsive, attuned partner, we feel less stress, we soothe our emotional response more easily. Our work will help you develop these healthy connections. And, I will be this partner standing with you on this journey of healing and growing.

 

In order to create lasting change, we have to feel our emotions and bring them alive in the session.. not just talk about them.

Research shows ‘deepening engagement in emotional experience…(is) key in the change process’ (Susan Johnson, 2022).

I walk with you to explore and understand your experience. We go into the emotional process under the problem to get specific, to bring it alive in the session. A lot happens in our nervous system, minds, bodies when an emotion gets activated and we respond.. all in about 10 seconds. It can feel overwhelming, chaotic, automatic, confusing. But together we can slow down to discover what happens for you and how your reaction to emotions makes sense. Emotions give us information about what is important to us and is adaptive and when we see ‘the why’ under it, it makes sense.

When it makes sense and you feel that I am ‘with you’- then emotions are not so scary or overwhelming. Then we can take one piece of that emotional experience and do something different with it.. so that your old, not so helpful pattern of coping is not the only option and the emotion is more resolved. A new response might include mindful self compassion to soothe and nurture our vulnerable, hurt, alone parts.

My therapeutic approach is a balance of challenge and support in a way that feels safe and ‘just right’ for you.